Archive for the ‘Teaching English in Korea’ Category

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English in Korea But Were Afriad To Ask

April 26, 2014
There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
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This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
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Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
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“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
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Avoiding Death In A Korean Hospital

November 7, 2013

Before I left the USA to teach English in Korea, I got an eye infection in my left eye that lasted for 2 weeks. It was extremely painful and really scared me. I was told by my ophthalmologist that I needed to have my left eye removed because I was still at risk for getting more infections. When I asked him how much the surgery would cost, he said that I would have to call the eye center at UC Davis and get a price from them. I called them a few days later and they said the surgery was going to cost around $24,000. I didn’t have any insurance, so I would have to pay the full amount.

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I knew there was no way for me to afford the surgery in the US.

Seven months later, I was in Korea teaching English. While in Korea, I decided to find an ophthalmologist in Korea. One who was recommended to me by another ophthalmologist in Mokpo. I scheduled an appointment with Dr. Yoon over the phone. While I was on the phone with Dr. Yoon he promised to have one of his assistant’s waiting for me in the waiting room on the date of my appointment.

The morning of my appointment, I took a taxi to the hospital.

“What’s your major problem?”

I didn’t know where to begin. I wasn’t used to being greeted at the door of a hospital. I was a little unnerved to be asked such a direct question after I had only taken less than two steps out of my taxi.

“Dr. Yoon.” I replied.

“OK, follow me.” replied a young doctor who appeared to be about 25 years old.

We walked through the waiting room full of Korean senior citizens in varying degrees of decline. Some had walkers, others sat uncomfortably as if they were waiting for a flight that had been delayed for over 10 years. We walked up to the second floor to see another waiting room filled with aging seniors. The young doctor asked me to sit down on a bench across from the elevator doors. In less than two minutes he returned and brought me into an examination room. I stared down the barrel of his eye examination equipment and tried to focus on an air balloon that was lifting off over a narrowing highway. Before I could get the balloon in focus the examination was over and he led me into another room. There was another doctor staring into a computer screen as we entered the room, as soon as he saw us come in he cleared out without saying a word. I sat on another examination chair and the young doctor told me that Dr. Yoon would be in shortly.

The door opened behind me and I was greeted by Dr. Yoon. He apologized for arriving late, I glanced over at a computer screen and checked the time, 10:12 am. “No problem, I’m glad that I could come and see you.” I said.

His first question was to ask me if I wanted eye surgery just for cosmetic purposes. I then went into my entire life history of having been blinded in my left eye by a rooster. After saying the word rooster Dr. Yoon’s head cocked slightly to the right, a non-verbal cue that he didn’t know the meaning of rooster. I then stuck my elbows out and flapped my arms while bobbing my head forward and pointing my nose out. “Oh, ok.” Replied Dr Yoon, acknowledging that he was following the story. I then told him about the fact that I had a slight scar on the left eye that was prone to infection and because of this I had to get the eye removed to avoid infections in the future. I also had an envelope full of documents in Korean and English that gave specifics on my eye problem. Dr. Yoon examined the documents and asked me who referred me to him. Luckily I had brought the business card with photo of my doctor in Mokpo. Dr. Yoon was very happy to see the card and said that he had lived in Mokpo for 10 years. Perfect, we were hitting it off so far. He then asked what city I was from in the US. I said San Francisco, knowing how much everyone in Korea loves San Francisco.

“Oh really, I studied at San Francisco State.”

It seemed that half of the Doctors in Korea have studied in California.

“What’s the name of the island there, Alcohol?” asked Dr. Yoon.

“Ah, Alcatraz, yes, have you been there?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“Wow, I have always wanted to go there.” I remarked, not sure if I was thinking of alcohol or Alcatraz.

“Can you put your chin on the bar?” asked Dr. Yoon.

I leaned forward and stared into another eye exam machine. Dr. Yoon asked me to look right, left, up and down. After the exams there were several photos of my left eye on his computer screen. I could clearly see the stitches over my cornea.

“Wow, that’s the first time I have seen the scars from my eye surgery.”

Dr. Yoon then started to explain about my two surgery options; Evisceration or Enucleation. Evisceration would be the cheaper option in which he would just basically suck the soft center of my eye out and fill it with a porous material (like draining the center of a raw egg). He’d then attach a prosthesis to the outside of porous center which would look like my original eye looked before my accident, 30 years prior.

“This option is what I recommend for older patients. For younger patients like you, I recommend getting Enucleation. Enucleation is the complete removal of the eye. You will also have to wait a month before the prosthesis is reinserted into the socket. The advantage of this surgery would be that you will have a fuller range of movement with the new eye but you’d have to wear an eye patch for a month between the first surgery and the final insertion of the new eye,” he informed me.

I didn’t much like the idea of wearing an eye patch while teaching my students, but at least I’d be in Korea. None of my friends back home would see me with my eye patch.

Dr Yoon pulled out a book of artificial eyes from a drawer. All the eyes were different shades of brown.

“Will I be able to get a green eye instead of a brown one?” I asked.

Dr. Yoon cocked his head to the side and sucked wind through his teeth, indicating that I had asked an extremely difficult question. Dr. Yoon quickly fired off some questions to his younger assistant, who was standing behind him with his arms joined behind him. The younger doctor then went foraging through another drawer that was filled with business cards. He found the one which belonged to the doctor who makes the prosthesis. He dialed the other doctor on his cell phone and left the room. He came back a few minutes later and confirmed the other doctor could make a green eye for me.

There was just one more minor impediment, I still didn’t have medical insurance in Korea. So, Dr. Yoon told his assistant to call my work and see when I’d be able to get insurance. Dr. Yoon then pulled out his 2010-2011 schedule. It was the size of a telephone. In this book was a list of all the surgeries he had planned for that year. I estimated that he did about 25 eye surgeries a month. He only did surgeries on Friday which meant each Friday he had between five and six surgeries. He looked like he was fully booked until January 2011 but he offered to open a window for me at the end of October 2010.

“That would be fine with me.” I responded.

Dr. Yoon then closed his book and looked at me. “You’re not rich are you?” he more or less stated it as a declaration and less like a question.

I said that I wasn’t.

“Maybe we can adjust the price for you. It still will be a little expensive.”

“How much?”

He pulled out a paper and starting totaling all the services I would need. First there would be an admission exam $90, second was the price of the surgery $750 and third was the price of the prosthesis $1,500, which totaled $2,340 without insurance. With insurance I’d only have to pay half that.

After I got back to Mokpo I asked my dermatologist Dr. Seung about Dr. Yoon.

“He’s a bad guy.” Dr. Sueng said after staring into his desk with his hands crossed over his forehead.

“Is he sleeping with a lot of women or is it a drinking problem,” I asked.

Surprised at his own forwardness Dr. Sueng became uncomfortable with the conversation.

“He was bad to his students,” replied Dr. Sueng, still in a state of discomfort.

“Was he having sex with them?” I wondered out loud.

“No, he was taking money. He was in the newspapers and he had to leave Seoul,” Dr. Sueng reported without elaboration.

“From the students? I asked.

Dr. Sueng couldn’t share any more information with me. I guessed it wasn’t so much a language problem, it was more of an etiquette thing, in which doctors generally weren’t supposed to engage in gossip about other doctors.

“I don’t know his skill,” was the last piece of information I got about Dr. Yoon from Dr. Seung.

I started to panic. Should I go through a surgery with a doctor who may be a perfectly competent doctor although he extorts money from his students? I walked home in a daze. Needing some advice, I called Jackie.

“There are two kinds of hospitals in Korea. The ones that rich people go to that are located in Seoul which are modern, clean and have qualified doctors. The other kind of hospitals are all the others not located in Seoul, where the poor people go. These hospitals are viewed by Koreans as roughly the same as going to India for health care.” Jackie replied over the phone. I decided I should go to Seoul for surgery since that’s where all the rich people went to be treated for their medical problems.

I talked with my dentist, who had a sister working in Seoul at Samsung Hospital and she booked me an appointment with a doctor in Samsung Hospital. While checking the Samsung Hospital website, I saw that Samsung Hospital was affiliated with Cedars Sinai in Los Angeles. I was also using a Samsung cell phone at the time which was pretty reliable so I decided this must be a sign. I arrived to Samsung Hospital at 8 a.m. Monday morning. There weren’t any doctors or interns waiting for me outside the hospital like my previous hospital visit. Samsung Hospital was huge, from the outside it looked to be at least 50 stories high. The inside looked like an M.C. Escher drawing, there were staircases winding in every direction. The information desk was unmanned so I decided to go to the pharmacy where there was one hospital employee hunched over her desk looking into a drawer. I showed her my appointment slip and she pointed at the opposite corner of the hospital. I wasn’t sure if she meant go down the hallway at the corner of the hospital or go upstairs. I decided to ask a guy who was dressed in a business suit talking on his cell phone. As soon as he saw my appointment slip he hung up his cell phone and we went on a mad chase around the hospital. We ended up in the International Clinic.

The first thing I saw when I got to this wing of the hospital was a stack of English language newspapers sitting on a table in the waiting room. There was one receptionist typing into her computer at the front. When she saw me walk in, she spoke loudly towards the back room in Korean. A minute later another receptionist came out from the back and started to talk to me. She looked at my slip and said that I needed to go back to the first floor where the Ophthalmology wing was located. I gave a heavy sigh indicating that I wanted her to carry me down there but she was already wishing me good luck and she walked back to the back room. As a means to further my inconvenience to her I asked if I could bring the stack of newspapers with me.

“They are for our patients,” she explained.

Darn it, foiled again. I receded back through the automatic doors and went to the Ophthalmology wing. I grabbed a ticket from the automatic ticket machine. After taking a ticket, the receptionist said to me. “Now closed, waiting.” I checked my Samsung cell phone and was pleased that it had only taken 35 minutes for me to find my appointment location. Promptly at 9:00 a.m. I was registered in the hospital and directed to another waiting room. 10 minutes later I was called to take an eye exam. For the thousandth time in my life they asked me to cover my right eye and read the letters and numbers off the board. I decided not to try and explain that I was blind in my left eye, I just said the number four about 17 times and the eye screener took away my eye cover to indicate that the test was over and I sat back in the waiting room. I then took one more test and by 10 a.m. I saw my first doctor. She looked to be about 17 but was very kind and didn’t seem to be offended in the least when I admitted that I couldn’t speak Korean. We chatted for about 10 minutes and she took notes on her computer about how long I had been in Korea and when I first started having problems with my left eye. She covered my right eye first with her hand and shined her light over my left eye to check to see if I could sense light. I felt relieved after this moment and started to relax. I told her that my left eye couldn’t sense light but I could see the light with my right eye through the cracks between her fingers. If I were to guess, I would guess that not many patients failed the light test. I was already setting records in my new hospital.

After our brief interaction, I was ushered back into the waiting room. As soon as I sat down another patient told me to put my jacket back on. I was too tired to put it back on and reminded me what month it was. I was too tired not to conform December rule of always wearing my jacket no matter what the temperature was indoors. I settled by draping it over the front of me and went to sleep instantly.

A few minutes later, I was awoken by another hospital employee and led into another room. This time the doctor was 20 years older and she had a team of medical staff working behind her. Her first question was to ask if I spoke Korean. I told her I didn’t and she then asked me why I didn’t get the surgery done in the US. I told her that I didn’t have medical insurance in the US. She then asked me if I had insurance in Korea. I said that I had just gotten it from my academy. She recommended that I get an Evisceration surgery which was less evasive than the Enucleation surgery. I told her that my last doctor, Dr. Yoon recommended that I get Enucleation surgery done. She asked why he would recommend that surgery and I got out my paperwork from Dr. Yoon.

“You have been studying about this surgery?” she asked, with a hint disbelief.

“Yes, I thought that the Evisceration surgery was only for older patients.” I replied.

She defended the Evisceration by noting that the recovery time was quicker and the results better. I was a little relieved that this doctor was taking the ball out of my hands and telling me which surgery I needed. We then discussed which orbital implant I wanted. I said that I wanted the Bio-Eye (made out of corral reef), the most expensive one they had. We made an appointment for surgery later the following month.

The night before my surgery date, I received a text message from Samsung Hospital informing me of all the things I needed to bring with me to the hospital: soap, bedding, slippers, water bottle, cup and a towel. The text message also said that I shouldn’t leave Mokpo until they called me and confirmed that there was a bed available for me. Ignoring the second part of the message I left Mokpo the day of the surgery at 6 a.m. I reasoned with myself that even if I got there three hours early and there was no bed for me, I could spend the extra time talking with my dermatologist and urologist who were also working at the same hospital.

As expected, I arrived to the hospital three hours early with no bed waiting for me. This was no problem since I still had to see my dermatologist before being admitted to my room. My dermatologist said he was prepared to operate on my backside to remove a cyst but said he would prefer to wait until I got my eye surgery, so we scheduled an appointment for the Friday after my eye surgery.

As soon as I went back to the ophthalmology wing, my room was ready. It was a double room and I could see that I had a roommate behind the curtain next to my bed. It sounded like he was sleeping, so I decided just to move my things in quietly and take all the extra layers of clothing off I had brought with me. The first thing I noticed about the room was that the bed had sheets and a blanket on it so it was unnecessary for me to have brought my sleeping bag along with me. Oh well. I moved the rest of my things into the room and decided to get a magazine out and do a little reading. The overhead light was burnt out so I rotated my body 180 degrees and used the light from the hall to illuminate my magazine. After reading for a half hour I decided to call one of my nurse friends working at the hospital. I had met her during my previous visit. She was nice enough to help me schedule my appointment, which I couldn’t do by myself because the person working in the scheduling department didn’t speak English. Inha answered the phone and surprisingly she remembered who I was. I told her which room I was staying in and she promised to visit me the next day. It was nice to have a friend working on the inside.

A few minutes later the charge nurse came in to welcome me. By this time my roommate was awake and he turned out to be another American who was from New York. His name was Stradlin and he said that he’d been living in Korea off and on since the 1970′s. He also had a heavily-bandaged head and a patch over his left eye from surgery.  In Korea, Stradlin worked as an actor in Seoul and was married to a very beautiful Korean woman. He was also finishing up the last four pages of his book in the hospital. I remembered seeing Stradlin’s name on the outside door of our room listed as, “Stradlin Izzy.” At the time I thought it was a strange name. I wondered why they had arranged his name to neatly fit with Korean-formatted names (last name before first name) but mine was still in the North American format. I guessed this meant that Stradlin had been accepted into Korean culture because they listed his last name first and his first name last.

“It was as if someone pulled a lampshade over my eyes. Two years ago the lamp shade was 25% closed, a year ago it was 50% and two weeks ago it was at 98%.” Stradlin quickly jumped into his vision history of how cataracts had slowly eroded his vision.

I didn’t really understand what he was talking about, so instead of replying to his initial thread of conversation, I started talking about Korea and how long each of us had been here. Shortly after we had started getting to know each other, I let the cat out of the bag and told Stradlin that I was working on a book about Korea.

“Oh really, I’m also working on a book.” Stradlin replied.

“What’s your book about?” I asked.

“It’s about a family living in a Post Apocalyptic New England town.” Stradlin answered.

“Oh yeah, like the movie that came out last year, The Road, did you see it?” I asked.

“What are you talking about?” replied Stradlin with a touch of anger.

(Awkward pause)

I decided to change the subject by asking him if I could read the pages he’d just written while in the hospital.

“These pages will be worth millions once your book gets on the New York Times Best Seller List.” I joked as I looked the pages over.

“Yeah, kind of like the original ten commandments.” he countered.

It seemed like we were off to a positive start. I was trying to make a connection with him so I wouldn’t have to worry about him going through my pants pockets while I was in surgery. The next few hours were a verbal pillaging of the soul of Stradlin. Who knows when was the last time he had the chance to speak with another American. He told me a story about a time he went to visit his blind cousin in Maryland when he was only six years old. “The only thing I can remember is that he was touching my face for a very long time, I think that’s the longest anyone has touched me face before.”

He then told me a little more about his book publisher who was living in Tokyo. “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”

Stradlin’s idea of a two way conversation was verifying the name of the city where I was from every 15 minutes or so. “You’re from Chino, right?”

“No, Chico.”

“Is that near LA?”

Then we’d get into the same revolving door conversation about how Chico kind of sounded like Chino, but aside from the name, geographically speaking it wasn’t in Southern California nor did it have a famous prison.

My cell phone started ring. “Brian, it’s Young. How are you? Are you in Samsung Hospital?”

“Yes, I’m in Samsung Hospital,” I responded.

“Good, when is your surgery?” he asked.

“Tomorrow,” I responded.

“Brian, I am going to call my friend who is the CEO of Samsung Hospital and tell him that you’re my friend. I need to know which room you are in,” instructed Young.

I went outside and read the number off my hospital room door. “I’m in room 758,” I said through the phone to Young.

“OK, don’t worry. I will make sure my friend knows who you are. I will come with SooHee to visit you after your surgery.” It was the first time in my life that I ever felt happy to be getting surgery in a hospital.

“OK Young, Thank you. I’ll talk to you after my surgery,” I responded before hanging up.

After hanging up the nurse came in to install my catheter. As she was installing the catheter, Stradlin came over to my bed to take a closer look at the procedure. He noticed me gritting my teeth.

“What’s the matter, you afraid of needles? They don’t bother me, I can take a needle in the arm, in the eye, up the ass, don’t bother me a bit.” Then he casually took a stroll into the hall to call his wife on the cell phone. After the catheter was installed our American dinners arrived to the room. Stradlin informed me that each American meal would cost an extra $23USD on my bill. Or, I could have Korean food for free. I decided to change my meals to Korean after that. As I was eating Stradlin wheeled his food tray up next to mine.

“Are they giving you local or general anesthetic?” he asked.

“I don’t know.” I honestly hadn’t thought my surgery that far through.

“They gave me local anesthetic, I was awake the whole time. I watched them as they stuck a 4-inch (10.63 centimeters) needle into my eye. It was supposed to kill the pain, didn’t really work. Then they started cutting at my eye and pulled the lens out like a Chinese noodle. I watched the whole thing,” he reported.

“When will you get your vision back?” I asked.

“It will take months, the doctor says that I should come back in three weeks. I can’t shampoo my hair for another two weeks, I can’t drink any alcohol for another three months or have sex with my wife either.” The whole reality of what I was really here to do started to sink in.

The next morning the nurses woke me up at 6 a.m. and gave me my full ration of food, pills, IV’s and asked me about my most recent bowel movement. Surgery was still four hours away, but I guessed they wanted to make sure my body was still in good enough condition to carry everything out as planned. I spent the next four hours watching a slightly sound-delayed version of CNN. The voices of the broadcasters could never quite keep up with their lips.

Before I knew it the nurses came for me and told me it was time for surgery. They told me to take off my underwear and socks. I got back into my bed just in my gown. They wheeled me into the hallway and I started my journey to the elevator. We went one floor down and I was wheeled down another hallway through some automatic doors. My first conversation was with an anesthesiologist. He explained which drugs I’d be getting.

“Will it be general or local anesthetic?” I asked, trying not to bite through my lip.

“General” replied the anesthesiologist.

I wanted to give him a kiss. Instead, I signed the paperwork and met with another doctor who I couldn’t recognize because she was wearing a face mask, until I heard her voice. It was the voice of the most famous eye surgeon in Korea, Dr. Kim Duck (as well as the best name of any doctor in any country).

“Brian, I got a call from the CEO of Samsung Hospital. He wishes you a successful surgery,” proclaimed Dr. Kim Duck. It was one of the few times in life I felt important.

I was starting to feel more confident. They wheeled my through another set of automatic doors and finally I was in the operating room of the space ship. I had to transfer from my bed on wheels onto the operating table. I looked over at the operating table and noticed that instead of a pillow, there was a blue gel donut. I assumed it was there for either displaying bowling balls or more likely, that is where my head would lie while I was having surgery. I transferred my body onto the operating table and lied flat on the table. Something wasn’t right, I could feel my head wasn’t properly aligned with the gel donut, so I scooted down the table a few inches, then leaned my head back down. I still couldn’t get it on top of the donut. This went on for another six minutes. Finally all the doctors lined up around the table and gave me oral instructions on how to get my head onto the donut. Unfortunately their instructions were all in metric, so I had to do my best and guess how much distance three centimeters was. Finally I got my head onto the donut. As soon as I was in place, they pulled the sheets up around me and folded me into the bed like a mummy. Next thing I knew, they are strapping the gas mask onto my face. I waited for someone to ask me to start counting backwards. Nothing. Don’t they know that in order for the sleeping gas to take effect, you must count backwards or it doesn’t work? Is this thing even hooked up to the gas? I better start breathing through my nose, so I can smell if there’s gas in this coming in or not. All I could smell was the plastic from the mask. Are they going to warn me when the gas starts? Maybe I should just rest my eyes here for a second….

The next thing I know, I wake up back in my room. Stradlin is still watching CNN and my head is pounding. I ask Stradlin to turn the volume down while my three nurses try to get my body in the right position in bed. Stradlin turns the TV off.

“Pain killer, please,” I mumbled to the nurses as they were rolling me into bed.

The nurses instantly went scrambling out into the hallway to fetch my meds. I had a short conversation with Stradlin about my last experience with taking Vicoden after I got my wisdom teeth taken out. Before I finished the story, I was given a glass of water and some pills. “Probably not anything that going to make me feel too psychedelic but who knows,” I thought to myself. I popped the pills, made sure that the rails were up on my bed and took a nice nap. The next ten hours are spent sleeping, eating and listening to Stradlin talk to his wife over the phone while in bed. It sounded like she wanted to come over tonight to sleep with Stradlin, but he tells her to get her work done first and then come in the following day.

“I’m hoping the doctor will let me go tomorrow,” these were the last words I heard before falling back to sleep.

I wake up again a few hours later and Stradlin says he’ll be staying in the hospital for another two days. I tell him that it’s better to be in the hospital than at home in case something goes wrong.

“I don’t believe in over-billing my health care provider. I could have stayed in a one bed room but am trying to keep health care costs down. My whole stay is covered here in the hospital, I don’t even have a $25 co-pay….”

In mid sentence the doctor came in to take Stradlin’s blood pressure. “Aw Doc, I have something that’s called white collar hypertension, I get an elevated heartbeat every time a doctor takes my blood pressure,” Stradlin reached into his pocket to show the doctor receipts from the auto pulse taker from the first floor of the hospital, “See, 116 over 70,” he exclaimed as he put the printed receipts of his blood pressure into the doctor’s front pocket. “I’m still planning on losing some weight, I want to get back down to my college weight which was 190 pounds, I only have 30 more pounds to go.”

Sometime shortly after the doctor left, I felt the bandage on my face. It felt as if there was about 20 pounds of cotton packed into the bandage. The pain wasn’t that bad unless I looked to my left or blinked too much. I decided just to let my right eye stayed closed, thus limiting the movement of my other eye. Every twenty minutes I had a little tear drainage from my left eye.

I got my first visitors to the hospital an hour or so later. SooHee and Young came to visit me. I couldn’t really open my eye for too much time so I mostly just talked to them with my eye closed. While we were talking, Young held my hand and prayed with me in English and Korean.

“Brian, did Dr. Kim Duck say anything to you about receiving a call?”

“Yes, she said she received a call from the CEO of the hospital. He encouraged her to give the patient in room 758 a successful surgery.”

I couldn’t see Young’s face, but I knew that he was very pleased when he heard this news.

I was thousands of miles from home, but the CEO of Samsung Hospital knew who I was and was making sure I was properly taken care of. While they were in the room with me I would blink my right eye open for a second every half minute. That’s as long as I could keep my right eye open without causing my left eye discomfort. During one of the times I blinked my eye open, I saw that they brought me a box of fruit juices, a bag of donuts and a box of oranges. They couldn’t stay for too long but brought a week’s worth of food. I was happy to know I’d have some snacks around to break up the monotony.

The next day Stradlin’s wife came over and she was definitely very pretty and probably 30 years younger than Stradlin. They had apparently met on the set of a Korean TV show called Giant. According to Stradlin he had a semi-steady acting gig as a US Army Colonel on the program.

When Stradlin’s wife asked him how he was doing his answer was flawless.

“Honey, I’m fine. The only problem in my life at the moment is that my tenet who’s living in my house in New York is thinking about moving out of the house. He’s been there nine and a half years, he’s worried about his job security and wants to find a cheaper house,” Stradlin informed his wife.

“What time will you be discharged tomorrow?” Stradlin’s wife asked.

“I want to see the doctor after lunch and then we can leave,” Stradlin replied.

“Is there a reason why you can’t see the doctor before lunch.” trying her best to hurry along the process.

“Naw, honey, we already made an appointment, besides, I want to get a meal before I leave,” replied Stradlin.

“This is why the Korean health care system is in crisis….” she cut herself off before finishing. I decided to take a walk and let Stradlin and his wife brainstorm ideas about solving South Korea’s health care crisis.

The following night was pretty casual, the only problem I had while sleeping was that the pulse reader kept slipping off my finger and that in turn would set the alarms off warning the nurses that I no longer had a pulse. This of course couldn’t be solved by simply putting the pulse reader back on my finger, the whole machine needed to be reset. I had a nice night’s sleep aside from the pulse reader slipping off twice. I had another half day to enjoy listening to Stradlin and his wife discuss how much work she was missing by coming to the hospital and at what time she could go home. I secretly wondered to myself why anyone gets married in the first place.

Before Stradlin left he gave me his business card and repeated the name of the city where I lived in the US to prove he was paying attention. “Not quite, I live in a place that sounds like Chino but isn’t on the coast nor is it in Southern California.”

I thanked him for being my roommate and wished him a quick recovery.

Later that day, I was moved into my new room which had six beds instead of two. For the next four days, I would wake up each morning at 6 a.m., go in to have my vision in my right eye checked and then have a doctor unbandage me and look at my left eye. I would then go back upstairs for breakfast and pills. Four days later I was out of the hospital and looking forward to teaching one day of class and then going on vacation for another four days. I left the hospital with a backpack full of drugs and instructions to come back to the hospital in two weeks so they could do a follow-up exam of my eye. I ended going back to Samsung Hospital once in February and six times in March before I finally got my replacement artificial eye. When my new doctor, Dr. Park took his first look at my new prosthetic eye he gave me a look commonly given when you accidentally get egg shells into the omelet. It wasn’t very reassuring. I wondered to myself if maybe the new eye was maybe the wrong color staring down and to the left.

“Different pupil color,” apologized Dr. Park.

After a couple more moments of uncertainty, Dr. Park agreed to give me a mirror and let me take a view for myself. I half expected to have been given an orange wolf’s eye. Some of the doctors’ assistants came into the room and were smiling pleasantly at me over Dr. Park’s shoulder as I checked out my new eye. It was eerily similar to my real eye, so much so that it took a few seconds for it to sink in that the new eye didn’t actually have vision. As far as I could tell the color was almost exact, maybe just a half shade difference and the eye tracked to the left and right with the other eye. Dr. Park then gave me a bag with a tiny suction cup and a bottle of contact lens cleaner. We practiced together how I should properly remove and clean the artificial eye. While I was at the sink I squirted some red hand cleaner into my hand in preparation to clean the artificial eye. “No.” echoed Dr. Park as he rinsed the soap out of my hand and loaded my hand with a clear soap. “What’s the difference between the two soaps?” I asked.

“Thursday Dr. Kim Duck explain.”

We then continued cleaning the eye. As I watched my new eye swish around in my hand, I did a quick mental measurement of the exposed drain at the bottom of the sink. One false move and the eye would spill out of my hand and be sucked down the drain.

“No Miss,” I didn’t bother turning to his assistant to ask for a translation. Dr. Park seemed to be reading my mind. He clearly was imparting upon me the importance of not losing my eye down the drain of a sink. I still had a lot of questions to ask about my eye maintenance but my questions would have to wait until Thursday when I would meet with Dr. Kim Duck.

When I came back to Samsung Hospital the following week, Dr. Kim Duck explained that I didn’t need any special soap to wash my eye and that I should use eye drops if the left eye ever felt uncomfortable.

________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
324288_10150780210710405_5010733_o
This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
 Taxes (yr)
Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid       $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000      $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

I Was Thrown Out Of My Last Korean Gym

November 6, 2013

“Brian, did you join a gym in Korea?” asked my Korean teacher Ms Jung, covering her mouth as she laughed.

“Yeah, but I got thrown out of my last gym.” I answered.

“Why?” asked Ms. Jung as she leaned in for my answer.

Image

“I asked the owner to turn down the music. He spoke enough English to understand what I was saying but refused to adjust the volume. So, I waited for him to go into another room. Once he left, I went behind the reception area and manually turned down the music volume while the receptionist was busy text-messaging. As soon as I walked back to my exercise bike a middle-aged Korean lady walked behind the reception area and turned the music back up. She then approached me while I was on the work out bike. She started yelling at me in Korean. As she was yelling at me, I looked around for the owner of the gym to come and protect me, he was no where to be seen. So, I walked over to reception to ask the receptionist for help. She ignored me. So I stood there in reception while the Korean lady yelled at me. A few minutes later the owner walked out into the work out area sipping a coffee. I walked over to him and I explained to him that the music is too loud in the gym and it was giving me a headache. Before he could answer, the Korean woman walked over and gave him an ear full in Korean. After she finished I asked him whether or not he was going to turn down the music again. ‘You must understand the middle-aged Korean woman,’ he responded. ‘Are you going to turn down the music or not?’ I repeated. He answered my question by repeating the same phrase, ‘You must understand the middle-aged Korean woman.’ We were getting nowhere. I then made up a story saying that I was expecting a call from my work on the cell phone and wanted to be able to hear it ring. He wouldn’t let up on the whole middle aged Korean woman thing. Clearly we were discussing two unrelated issues here. I decided to cut to the chase, “Are you going to turn the volume down or not? Yes or No?” He then went into a routine about how the customers didn’t appreciate the fluctuation in volume.

‘After you turn the volume down 15%, you can leave it at that volume until 2014 without any fluctuation.’ I responded as I stood there waiting for him to walk over to the radio and turn it down. Instead, he just stood there looking back at me. I pointed at reception and asked him to turn it down one last time, but he wouldn’t budge. Finally I went back to my workout bike and pretended the whole thing never happened and finished my work out. Two days later I went back to the gym and the radio was at the same volume. When I checked in, I had a sticker on my gym key saying it was time to pay up for the next month. I went into the locker room, threw my towel into the sink and decided I would wait until leaving Korea before I went back to another gym.”

________________________________________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
324288_10150780210710405_5010733_o
This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

Korean McDonald’s and Konglish

April 24, 2013

The key to surviving in Korea is mastering a language I like to call Konglish. Konglish is a language like English but spoken with a Korean accent. Example: if you get in a taxi and say “McDonald’s,” the taxi driver will stare back at you blankly. You then repeat it slowly, “Mc-Do-nald’s.” You then go into a miming game where you say “McDonald’s” slowly while airbrushing an “M” into the air in front of him. “Oh! McDonald-zuh,” he’ll repeat back joyfully. In Korean no word can end with a consonant sound. So, all words, including the entire Konglish catalogue, must end with a vowel sound. Another note, all the “L” sounds and “R” sounds are reversed. Also, in Korean they can’t pronounce the “F” sound. Instead, they convert all “F” sounds turn into a “P” sound. So, instead of saying refill, in Konglish you say, “Leepilluh.” These are the three most important rules of Konglish.

Image

Konglish is occasionally frustrating, often confusing, and almost always entertaining. It’s one of the main reasons for misunderstandings between Koreans and foreigners. And for an English teacher, it’s a daily battle that will probably never be won.

Some English words have been adopted by the Korean language, just as they are, to mean the things that they, really mean. Example: Game, Sticker and Computer. These are a few that English teachers pick up when listening to the Korean students talking amongst themselves. However, for the most part, most Konglish words have taken on new meanings, so that they now mean something completely different than they do to native speakers. Or, even more confusingly, there’s only a very slight, subtle difference. That’s Konglish; English words, but with a new Korean meaning.

Here’s a partial list of Konglish words.

When they say…………….. they mean

Sharp………………………………mechanical pencil

(e.g. “Teacher, where’s my sharp?” This means, “Teacher, where’s my pencil?”)

Academy…………………………..private school attended after public school is over (Usually between 3 p.m. and 10 p.m. They are also sometimes called “cramming schools” by English newspapers)

White……………………………….White-Out

Service………………………………Free (as in “it’s on the house!”)

Handphone…………………………..Cell phone/Mobile phone

(pronounced hen-duh-pone)

Apart…………………………………Apartment

(pronounced “ah-pah-tuh”)

Apartment……………………………Whole apartment building

Eye shopping………………………….Window shopping

One shot!…………………………….Bottoms up!

Hair rinse…………………………..Hair conditioner

Skinship……………………………Making out – kissing, touching

Fighting!……………………A shout of encouragement, like “Go team!” or “Let’s do it!”

Time…………………………………….Hour

(e.g. “I slept 8 times last night”…. “I slept for 8 hours last night”)

Let’s Dutch pay!……………………….Let’s go Dutch!

So-so……………………………….…..Boring, uninteresting

(e.g. “It was very, very so-so”…..”It was very, very boring”)

Pop song………………………………..Any song in English

Cunning…………………………………Cheating/copying work

Pronounced (“conning”)

(e.g. “Teacher!! John is cunning!”…”Teacher!! John is cheating/copying!”)

Overeat…………………………….…..Throw up, vomit

Dessert…………………………….…..Cup of tea after meal

The most frustrating time I had with Konglish was at the Post Office when I had to send off a letter but wanted to correct the address on the envelope. I kept repeating “White-Out,” but nobody understood. Finally I called a native speaker on my hand phone (cell phone) and he explained it to the clerk at the post office. Before the clerk hung up, he said, “Oh, white.”

“Shouldn’t he have been able to guess what I meant when I said ‘White-out.’ The words are pretty close?” I thought to myself. If you start to wonder things like this in Korea, you will slowly go insane.

______________________________________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.

Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500USD a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.Image

This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.

Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country.  “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.

This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.

Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600

“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:

Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck

This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.

Chapter 2
Academy Owners

This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.

In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.

Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class

I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.

Chapter 4
Bars and Churches

There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.

Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router

I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.

Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea

I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.

Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café

In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.

Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea

Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.

Chapter 9
Kidman

Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.

Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router

I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.

Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea

I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.

Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café

In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.

Chapter 13
Lesson Plans

Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.

Chapter 14
Dating in Korea

Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.

Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget

Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”

“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

December 28, 2012
There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
324288_10150780210710405_5010733_o
This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

How Did You Decide To Teach English in Korea?

December 28, 2012

“Take whatever you can get, instead of going after what you really want. Take what’s safe and certain. Settle. Start paying down a mortgage and quit whining about your dreams,” I would often hear when asking others for career advice.

Image

I guess what people figure is that if they drone on you for long enough about what they want you to do, you’ll forget what it is you really want to do. I had to take a few days just to clear out my head of all the advice everyone had given me and try to remember what my dream was in the first place.

“What do you really want to do in this life?” I asked myself. “Travel the world for free,” I answered.

I decided to visit the career center website at Chico State. I entered “Teaching English in Korea” into the search engine and clicked on the link. A table then popped up on my screen comparing a teaching job in Korea with one in an American high school.

Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600

It was time for a different path in life. After seven months of waiting, I finally got a job with a Korean recruiter in Seoul (before any native English teacher can be hired from the US or Canada, they first need to go through a recruiting agency that places them in a job in Korea – most of the recruiting agencies are located in Korea). My new job was at an English academy in Southern South Korea. All I needed now was to get a South Korean visa.

I got my visa in the mail a few weeks later and departed for Korea in March of 2010. As I was clearing customs in Seoul, I ran into another American who was also coming to Korea to be a teacher. I recognized him from the San Francisco airport, he was probably the only person in Korea with a mullet. Not only did he arrive to Korea with a haircut seen sparsely outside of North American trailer parks, he had gone out of his way to sculpt the tail into a “V.” My conversation with him would be repeated thousands of times during my stay in Korea. “In which city do you work? What’s the name of your academy?”

I explained to him that I didn’t work in Seoul and actually lived on the other side of the country from Seoul. I fought hard to avoid living in Seoul. I had seen too many documentaries about the guys in Tokyo whose job it is to cram bodies into the subway before the doors closed. I also didn’t want to end up in the Korean Ozarks. I settled on a medium-sized town called Mokpo. Mokpo is a port city located in the southwest corner of the Korean peninsula. Mokpo’s population is approximately 280,000. Mokpo tends to be a few degrees cooler in summer and a few degrees warmer in winter compared to Seoul. It was also one of the few cities in Korea whose name I can pronounce.

If you ask anyone Korean from Seoul what they think of Mokpo, they will promptly turn up their nose at you and say, “Mokpo not Korea,” meaning that Mokpo is a “cultural backwoods” compared to Seoul – or in other words, Mokpo is to Korea what Hillsboro, West Virginia is to the United States. Or to be put another way, Mokpo is to Korea what David Hasselhoff is to acting, it’s ok to joke about it with your friends but it doesn’t make for polite dinner conversation when you’re hosting important guests over for dinner.

__________________________________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
324288_10150780210710405_5010733_o
This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

Dating In Korea

December 27, 2012

“You need a Korean girlfriend.”

This is what all my Korean male friends would tell me constantly. It was easier said than done.

Of the 300 Native English teachers, 180 of them came in couples. Of the 120 left, probably 40 of them had girlfriends or boyfriends back home. That left 80 or so single teachers. 40 of those were males. Of those 40, four successfully got Korean girlfriends while living in Mokpo.

The first native teacher with a Korean girlfriend’s name was Mick. He met his Korean girlfriend at a dance club in Gwangju, which is about 40 minutes outside Mokpo.

“How does your girlfriend’s father like you?” I asked Mick.

“Well, he doesn’t know I exist. My girlfriend said that if her father found out that she was going out with a foreigner, she would be out of the family.”

That didn’t stop them from going out, but for a Korean woman to marry a foreigner it can usually have immediate repercussions in her family.

The second native teacher I met with a Korean girlfriend was my roommate Axl. He actually came to Korea with a girlfriend in Ohio but halfway through his stay he decided that he wasn’t going back to live with her and he wanted to stay in Korea. He met a Korean girl named Gloria during a private English lesson. She was taking English lessons in Mokpo because she was planning to apply for a teaching job at a university in a city called Jeonju, which is an hour north of Mokpo. Gloria successfully got the job in Jeonju. They started dating shortly after she moved to Jeonju. Almost every weekend, Axl would take the bus to visit Gloria in Jeonju. They were getting along so well that Axl decided to apply for a job in Jeonju so they could live in the same town. It took him four months of searching but he finally got a job teaching in Jeonju.amKorean

The night before Axl was set to leave Mokpo, he got a call from Gloria saying she was breaking up with him. It was too late for him to stay in Mokpo, his position had already been taken by a new teacher and his room was also taken.

Although he was sad about what happened with Gloria, he still wanted to have a going away dinner. We had three-person dinner with a Korean girl named Pam.

“I really want a boyfriend, I am so lonely,” remarked Pam while we were eating dinner together.

“I thought you had a boyfriend.” Axl commented.

“No, I haven’t had a boyfriend in two years. I want an American boyfriend I can just have sex with, nothing serious. I want you to be my boyfriend” Pam said to Axl.

I looked at Axl’s reaction, he just stared into the table as if his heart was in his throat. Here he was leaving for Jeonju pursuing a girl who didn’t want to be with him. While all along a from a girl in Mokpo wanted to have sex with him. I asked Axl why Gloria had broken up with him. He said something about her being too busy. What I take that to mean was that it was great to have a friend come visit but once he starts living in the same city, the Korean girl gets nervous about maybe this guy will try to marry me and then I can get stuck in a sticky spot.

Axl moved to Jeonju the following day. He is probably, to this day, traveling to Mokpo every weekend to visit Pam.

The third native teacher with a Korean girlfriend was an American friend of Jonathan’s. The way the American met his Korean girlfriend was during a dance party. During the party Jonathan and his friend danced with two Korean girls. The two girls were really animated and fun to be with. Because neither of the girls spoke English fluently, Jonathan had to translate everything that went on that night to his foreigner friend. While dancing, Jonathan and his friend introduced themselves to the girls.

They replied back in Korean. Jonathan translated, “Their names are Tammy and Jee Hey,”  Jonathan relayed to his foreign friend. He then asked them about their jobs. “Jee Hey graduated from a top university in Seoul and she is the owner of an English academy. She also lived three years in China and speaks fluent Mandarin,” Jonathan explained to the foreigner.

He then asked Jee Hey to demonstrate her Chinese to the American. She spoke a couple of lines of Chinese and everyone was satisfied. After the party, he and Jonathan invited the two Korean girls to have a drink with them.

So, the group all got into Jonathan’s car and went to drink soju. While drinking soju together the girls dared Jonathan and his American friend to take each girl in their arms and squat them to see who was the strongest. The American guy was a little nervous about the dare but Jonathan accepted freely.

The night went so well they ended up going to the Karaoke with the girls after drinks. In the Karaoke they drank plum wine and started to play a “numbers” game. The rules of the game were simple. Jonathan would write different numbers on tiny scraps of paper and put them in a hat.

On another piece of paper he would write a list of 1-10 with the instructions of what the person had to do if they drew a certain number. (ex: #1 – Go to the front of the karaoke and do a sexy dance, #4 – You must drink a shot of soju, #8 – You must sing a song while another person rides piggy back on you). It was a genius game.

As luck would have it, Jonathan’s foreign friend pulled the #8 and asked Jee Hey to ride on his back while he sang, “Hurts So Good” by John Cougar. Before Jee Hey climbed onto his back she took off her shoes and then latched her legs around his waist. By the time the foreigner got to the chorus of “Hurts So Good” Jee Hey had started kissing the American on the neck. He was nervous, out of breath and wasn’t known for his vocal skills but he continued to sing the entire song. At the end of the song they hugged each other and he thanked her for participating.

By the time it reached 4 a.m. the girls were tired and wanted to go home and take a rest. Before they left, the foreign guy asked Jee Hey for her number through Jonathan. A 12 minute conversation in Korean followed between Jee Hey and Jonathan. “What are you talking about?” asked the foreigner. “She says that she really likes you but she’s not sure if you want to go out with her.” said Jonathan. “Why not?” asked the foreigner. “She was divorced from her first husband and wonders if you still want to go out with her.” replied Jonathan. “What’s the big deal?” wondered the foreigner. Jee Hey interrupted and explained in Korean a little more about the situation. “She wants to know if you date girls who are divorced.” Jonathan translated. “Yes, why not?” the foreigner responded. “Well, in Korea, sometimes Korean men don’t like dating women who have divorced.” reported Jonathan. The whole situation was finally cleared up and Jee Hey agreed to give the foreigner her phone number and they went on another date a few months down the road. After that they broke up due to language problems and the fact that Jee Hey was working six days a week, going to church on Sundays and also trying to run her academy.

The fourth native teacher with a Korean girlfriend was a friend of Ole’s. The inter-racial couple was the most visible couple in Mokpo. They went out often and were very popular because they both had such an extended network of friends. One night the Korean girl invited some male Korean friends of hers to come out on a date with her and her native English teacher boyfriend. The night started out pleasant enough, everyone was getting along fine until one of her Korean male friends had a little too much to drink and started causing a commotion. Finally he stood up at their table and berated her in Korean for having a foreign boyfriend and called her trash in front of their Korean friends, a very uncomfortable situation for everyone. They continued dating but had to reduce their circle of friends to avoid future outbreaks.

Added to the social pressures of a Korean person dating a foreign person are the language problems (3% of Korean girls in Mokpo speak fluent English), cultural issues (Korean girls usually aren’t allowed to be alone in a single man’s apartment) and the religious issue (65% of Koreans are Christian and this means their daughters can’t have sex before marriage). When I say a Korean person is a Christian, this is not the same as a North American Christian. Korean Christians go to church up to six days week and spend anywhere from 20-60 hours a week in church. For them it is not so much a religion but a lifestyle choice.

Dating in Korea is similar to every other country; complicated.

__________________________________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
324288_10150780210710405_5010733_o
This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

My Korean Co-Teacher Accused By His Ex-Wife Of Burning Down His House

December 27, 2012

On my way to work one day I ran into a middle-aged Korean gentleman. He was staring at me as we walked parallel on the sidewalk, this was nothing knew for me so I didn’t think anything of it. As I got into the elevator at my academy, he was still with me. Fourth floor, we both got out and I began walking into the academy.Image

“I have a question,” he proclaimed. “Can you help me?” he then walked into the boss’ office and wrote two sentences on the board.

Your car will be running next week.

Your book will be published next week.

“Why can’t we say, “Your book will be publishing next week?’”

He went on and on and sighted numerous examples. All the while the rest of the Korean teachers were wondering what we were doing in the boss’ office debating in English. Finally the receptionist closed the door on us. That was our clue to wrap up our debate class. I still had no idea who this English-speaking Korean was. As we were walking out of the boss’ office, I sat down at my desk and the Korean guy sat next to me.

“My name is Kid, I hope to be working here soon. I have been teaching English in Korea for over 10 years. My last job was as a tour guide. I used to take Korean exchange students to Canada and teach them English. I got deported from Canada at the airport for talking too much. Have you been to Cancun?”

“Yes.”

“Is it nice? I was supposed to go last year but I had been drinking for two months and I was too weak to pick up my suitcase. My mother bought the ticket.” he said.

So far this was the longest conversation I’d ever had with a Korean at work.

“I have been to Florida, I like the beaches there but it’s nothing special. The first time I went to a strip club, a naked woman approached me and I fell out of my chair. I had never seen a naked woman walking around in a bar before,” Kid admitted.

By default this guy was going to be my best friend at work. He’s the only one I could actually have a conversation with. He interviewed a few minutes later, got the job and then invited me to a buffet that weekend.

I was curious to hear what other stories he had to tell. When I met him in front of the buffet restaurant, I was surprised to see we were dressed exactly alike. We were both wearing shorts, sandals, hats and sun glasses. Kid said that he hadn’t eaten at this buffet but for $6, we might as well try it.

“While I was in Florida, I was in a mental institution. I was on the second floor. The building had 7 floors. The higher the floor the more crazy a person is. I was just there for 24 hours. I was drinking too much,” Kid was on a roll. He then listed off the names of people who owed him money.

“What’s the chance you’ll get the money back?” I wondered.

“The guy who owes me the most money is my drinking buddy Roger, he stayed at my house in Jeju island for two months, and he never paid any rent. I figure he owes me $600. Jeju is more expensive than Mokpo. I’ve been in the news twice on Yahoo! Korea. The first time was for burning down my apartment. My ex-wife claims I was trying to commit suicide. Why would I do such a thing? I was making rent money from four university students who were living with me in the apartment.” Kid claimed. “The second time I was in the news in Yahoo! Korea was the time I had a few too many beers and decided to go for a swim across Mokpo bay in the Yellow Sea.”

“How far is that?” I asked.

“I don’t know, all I did was swim out past a navy ship and come back. When the Navy saw me they called the police. By the time the police got there I had already gotten back into my car and was halfway home.”

After lunch we decided to take a drive. I was hoping we weren’t going swimming. During the drive he started to talk about a Japanese woman who he met on the internet. After chatting with her for a few months, he invited her to come to Korea. She came a few months later.

“She was always complaining about Korean motorcyclists not wearing helmets,” reported Kid.

Apparently they decided to go to a nearby island together on what was “not a date” according to Kid. On the third day the Japanese woman asked Kid, “Do you like this island?”

“No, it’s nothing special,” he replied.

“I don’t feel comfortable with you, I want to go back to Japan,” she replied as she started to pack her clothes into her suitcase.

“Then she rented a car and went back to the airport, I offered to pay but she insisted,” reported Kid.

The guy seemed to be having the worst 20 years in human history.

“Do you know what ‘pulling a runner’ is?” Kid asked me.

I didn’t.

“At my last academy we had a teacher from Canada who really hated teaching small children. So, one day he grabbed a kid by his ankles and threw him out of the classroom,” Kid swore to the accuracy of this story.

“What happened to the teacher?” I asked, completely floored by what he said.

“The teacher left Korea the next day, before the academy could fire him. He packed up his things and left. Let’s go have some beers,” Kid suggested.

This guy was a pretty free spirit without drinking any alcohol, I wondered what would happen when I went drinking with the guy. We drove back to the downtown area and met a friend of mine Carmen. As we started talking, Kid fell in love with her.

“Would you like to have some beers with us?” Kid asked Carmen.

“Yes,” replied Carmen.

We ended up getting some tall cans and going to the batting cages. While at the batting cages we ran into the second weirdest person in Mokpo, Kevin. Kevin was a Korean-Hawaiian who had been teaching in Mokpo for five years. The only other time I had seen Kevin was at Moe’s Bar where he got angry with the bar tender for not opening up a tab for him, so he threw a handful of napkins at the bar tender and stormed out. Since then he’d been blacklisted by Moe’s bar and all the other foreigners in Mokpo. He basically had no friends in Korea.

Pretty soon we started talking with Kevin and he joined the party. Kevin was in rare form that night. We started drinking more beers in front of a restaurant and Kid was really interested in getting to know Kevin.

“Kevin, I hear you’re from Hawaii, is it nice there?” Kid asked.

“Yeah,” Kevin replied.

“Kevin, do you have a girlfriend?”

“No,” replied Kevin.

“Kevin, do you like drinking beers?”

“Yes,” He answered.

This went on for another half hour. Kid would ask Kevin questions in rapid succession. And Kevin, still suspicious of us, would answer each question with one word.

“Kid, I think I’m going to go home, I’m tired.” I said.

“We’ll leave after you have one more beer. Kevin, I know you like to party, where do you party around here?”

“Well, I don’t know any…” Kevin trailed off.

“You know what I like about you Kevin, you’re not a kiss-ass. I don’t like hanging around people who are always telling me how great I am. I like guys like you who don’t say much,” declared Kid.

“Hey Kid, I think I want to go home,” I pleaded.

“Just have another beer and we’ll leave soon. Now, Kevin, if I wanted to call you sometime, is there a phone where I could reach you?” asked Kid.

Kevin started to pull his cell phone out of his pants pocket. But just as he started to open it up. He reminded himself he couldn’t trust anyone.

“Actually this phone is just for work,” Kevin said as he closed he phone back up and put it in his pocket.

“Kevin, are you sure you don’t know any place to party around here?” asked Kid for the second time.

“There’s one place we could go, if you want to dance,” Kevin offered.

I was too tired to go with them. So, as they were leaving to go dancing. I walked the other direction, going behind the restaurant. Just as I was crossing the street, my cell phone started to ring. It was Kid and he tried to convince me to come back. I ran home, afraid that I would get stuck drinking with those guys all night.


____________________________________________________________

 

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.

Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500USD a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.Image

This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.

Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country.  “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.

This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.

Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600

“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:

Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck

This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.

Chapter 2
Academy Owners

This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.

In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.

Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class

I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.

Chapter 4
Bars and Churches

There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.

Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router

I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.

Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea

I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.

Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café

In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.

Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea

Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.

Chapter 9
Kidman

Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.

Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router

I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.

Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea

I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.

Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café

In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.

Chapter 13
Lesson Plans

Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.

Chapter 14
Dating in Korea

Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.

Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget

Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”

“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Guide to South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com

 

Teaching English in Korea and The Final Contract Negotiations

December 26, 2012

My last month in Korea teaching English was the most brutal for me. My co-workers were running out of patience with me after I had missed six days of work in the last five weeks of my contract due to being in the hospital. I was trying to make it to the finish line without getting into any verbal altercations. My American co-teacher George was also nervous because so far the academy still hadn’t found another person to replace me as a teacher. So, seven days before my contract was to end I asked my co-teacher Musong when the academy would buy me a plane ticket home.

“No ticket.” he said flatly, not even bothering to look up from his text messaging. From that moment on I knew getting my affairs finished in Mokpo was going to be like going 10 rounds with Tyson. I decided to not bring up my request again until the following Monday. Over the weekend I made some calls around Korea, trying to get a free ticket to the US. I tried to be an Orphan Escort or an Air Courier.

“Now most adoptive parents pick up their adopted children up in Korea,” answered the secretary at Orphan Escorts in Seoul. I guess back in the old days the adoptive parents just signed some paperwork in the US and waited for 6-8 weeks for a Korean orphan to come in on a plane. The Air Courier gig was impossible to get any information on. I guessed that probably most people who needed something delivered just used DHL.

Smart and handsome asian businessman

That weekend wasn’t all bad, I was looking forward to my going away party with all my friends from the Angel-In-Us Café English meetings. One hour into the party Jonathan, Jackie and I got thrown out of my going away party, along with the other males at the party. I guess at some point Jonathan got a little too loud. He also may have had a couple few too many beers. The girls who arranged the party got angry at Jonathan for ordering them around and because of this, all the males were thrown out of the party. We didn’t even have a chance to cut the cake. Instead, we all went out to a nearby bar and texted the girls to come down but they never did. I would rather be outside of the party with Jackie and Jonathan than inside without them so I didn’t mind too much.

Starting Monday, I was even more desperate to close out my contract life in Korea and get my last month’s pay check and a plane ticket out of the country. On Monday, Musong had a change of heart and said that he would talk to the boss the next day about my ticket. When the next day arrived I asked Musong what the boss said and he replied that “She is busy this week,” as he was escorting a student downstairs. I remembered the email I received from another former co-teacher Duff (who was interested in renewing a contract with the school). He said he received an email saying that the academy wanted him back but was often too busy to make any final plans. Steam started to pour out of my ears.

“Where are you going?” I asked Musong. I started walking towards his class room and gave him some hand signals to follow me.

“Why is it that she’s too busy this week but will be able to do my ticket next week? What’s the difference between this week and next week? This waiting for my ticket is making me nervous,” I told Musong once we were back in his classroom, trying to remain calm.

“Actually Miss Kang is angry at you,” replied Musong.

This statement kicked off a 10 minute tirade about how me missing six days of work due to being in the hospital was causing the rest of the teachers extra hours of work and pushing the financial status of the company into bankruptcy.

“Have any teachers in Korea ever had to go to the hospital and miss work?” I asked.

“You don’t say sorry, you don’t care about the other employees,” replied Musong.

“What do you care more about, your health or your job?” I replied.

“I care more about my health then my job but I don’t care more about your health than my job,” replied Musong. I flashed back 10 years and thought about a conversation I had with my Japanese roommate. He told me that he was surprised how “direct” Americans were in casual conversation. This statement from Musong was probably the most honest and direct answer I’ve ever gotten from any Western or Non-Western person. I tried to steer the conversation back onto the rails towards sanity. But, it was too late, we were already on the train to crazy town.

“What do you think about me?” Musong asked.

“I think you need to work on your communication,” I responded.

“I am very angry at you,” replied Musong.

“Yeah I know, you….”

“Don’t interrupt, I am communicating.”

I waited for him to tell me to get out of his class room but that moment never came. Instead he just gave me more feedback about the way I treated my co-workers and the boss. The discussion didn’t end in mutual understanding or an agreement. Instead, it was a chance for each of us to vent our frustrations at the other person. In life, people usually save their harshest criticisms of others until the time right before money is to be exchanged.

I left his room and walked back to my officetel. On my walk back home I wondered why they hadn’t planned for my departure better and if they were so concerned about teachers missing classes, why hadn’t they found a new teacher to replace me with a week to go on my contract? If everyone at work was so severely impacted by my absence, wouldn’t that motivate them to make sure my replacement teacher would start work on the date of my departure? George had brought in two of his friends to interview for teaching positions at the academy, but neither got the job. The academy was apparently banking on the second coming of Christ in the form of a native English teacher.

I texted Musong the next day, asking what our boss, Miss Kang, said to him about my contract settlement and ticket.

“None to me,” read his message.

I decided that at this moment I had two options; get a lawyer or find someone scary enough to get them to give me my ticket. I chose the first option. I immediately texted all of my Korean friends in Mokpo, asking them for the number of an English-speaking Korean lawyer. Three minutes later I got a call from my friend Pastor Choi from Sarang Community Church.

“Where are you?” He asked. “Can you come to my church?”

“I’m in front of E-Mart, I will get in a taxi now and come to your church,” I responded

“Ok, I’m in my office on the 6th floor.”

I walked into Pastor Choi’s office 20 minutes later. I retold the tale of my failed attempts to get my plane ticket from the academy. Pastor Choi asked to see my contract. As I opened my backpack to take out my contract the phone rang. It was Musong and he asked me to come to the school immediately. I asked if Miss Kang was there and he said yes. I told Pastor Choi that my work had just called.

“Can I guide you?” asked Pastor Choi. “I can take you to the academy from here in my car.” I had to think about this one. I finally accepted Pastor Choi’s offer, we jumped into his car and headed for the academy. I felt as if I were being taken to the firing range.

As we pulled up in front of the academy, I got very nervous. I knew I didn’t stand a chance in there unless I had a moderator. I asked Pastor Choi to come to the negotiations with me. He accepted without hesitation. Before getting out of the car Pastor Choi spoke, “Let’s try and speak humbly with your boss.” he said. I of course agreed.

As we were entering the academy building Choi quickly said, “Let’s pray first.” So we went into the alley behind the academy and bowed our heads, “Dear Heavenly Father, we can do anything without you.” I kept my snickering to myself, I knew Pastor Choi was doing his best, even if the grammar wasn’t exactly perfect. After our prayer we went upstairs and entered the academy. As we walked in we saw Musong was sitting in the corner, staring into his cell phone as usual.

As he rose to greet us, I introduced my friend Pastor Choi as “Mr. Choi.” After seeing I had brought Mr. Choi, Musong looked at the ground and did one of his oxygen-depleted laughs. He then called Miss Kang to tell her everything was in place. The three of us sat down together and Musong chatted amicably with Mr. Choi for the next 20 minutes. Each time the front door opened of the academy, the three of us raised our heads to see if it was Miss Kang coming into the office. Each time it wasn’t her.

“Ding.” sounded the elevator.

As soon as the elevator door opened a verbal outpouring spilled out of my 5’2” Korean boss. Choi and Musong immediately came to their feet as Miss Kang berated us. See didn’t stop yelling or even bother to ask who the visitor was. She was way too far into her rant to be bothered with small details. The only words I recognized were “Samsung Hospital” and “communication,” the later she said in English. My heart was pounding but I knew my role in this entire process was just to be a spectator. Choi attempted to get in a few words edgewise but was incapable of delivering his message. Her speech was interrupted by her phone, after quickly addressing her caller and hanging up, she motioned for us to come into her office. As we sat down Miss Kang asked Mr. Choi a few questions, I could tell by Choi’s response “…….Sarang Church” that Miss Kang had asked Mr. Choi what his job was. As soon as Mr. Choi revealed that he was a Pastor of a church with over 500 middle school student mothers and fathers in attendance, Miss Kang’s tone changed completely.

“Musong…….coffee.” she called.

Once the coffee was served Miss Kang and Pastor Choi had what sounded like a personal chat and Musong pulled out his notebook to discuss the terms of my settlement. He wrote four points in his notebook.

1)         Phone bill

2)         Medical insurance amenity

3)         Plane ticket

4)         Pay check

He let me know that Miss Kang would be subtracting six sick days from my final paycheck. Musong asked me if I knew what “Medical insurance amenity” meant. I guessed it had something to do with me paying money to somebody. He explained that it actually was a refund that I’d be getting. We then made plans to meet me at 12 noon the next day to address the four points and to close out my contract.

Things got off to a rough start from the beginning. For some reason Musong had thought we could buy a plane ticket at his bank. The bank teller informed us that we would have to call the airline to make the reservation.

Musong then made about three or four phone calls trying to make a plane ticket reservation, intermediately he’d ask me to show him my resident card while he was on the phone. He’d then read off the numbers into the phone. After several calls, Musong hung up the phone and stared at the ground in defeat.

“What’s the problem?” I asked.

“Lack of time,” was his only response.

We packed up our paperwork and went down stairs. I suggested we go to a travel agent to get a ticket price. After saying this we both walked in different directions, Musong then yelped back at me to follow him.

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“To find a quiet place,” he responded.

Even though Musong was Korean and I was a foreigner, I could tell he had no clue as to the layout of the city or where to go. In my mind this revealed Musong’s obsessive dedication to working long hours in the academy. He was a stranger to the world outside of the academy.

As we were waiting to cross the street, Musong asked me why I hadn’t stayed at the academy after Mr. Choi had left.

“You didn’t tell me you wanted me to stay,” stating the obvious.

Musong then informed me that there were some “tasks” that I needed to do after the settlement that I had missed.

“If you wanted me to come back to the academy to do the tasks, why didn’t you just call?” I replied, suddenly feeling my face turning red.

“It’s not my job to call you to come into work. I’m not your secretary,” replied Musong.

I could tell this was not the best way to start what promised to be a long day of waiting in line together.

“Musong, I don’t want to argue with you, I’m tired of…..”

“You’re tired.” he cut himself off before finishing his point. We then went into a convenience store to have an ice coffee and regroup. While in the convenience store Musong made a call to my bank. This call didn’t end well either. We were both getting frustrated. It seemed that we couldn’t do anything about the ticket or my bank account, so we decided to work on the medical insurance amenity and paying my phone bill. The phone bill went smoothly, they even agreed to let me to keep my phone for an extra few days. The medical insurance amenity was a little more complicated. I had brought my previous money transfer statement (back when I thought I was leaving Korea ten months prior) showing my bank account number in the US, but there were so many different numbers on the wire transfer statement that I had forgotten which numbers corresponded with my bank account. And everything was written in Korean. Neither Musong nor the medical insurance amenity lady could distinguish which numbers coincided with my bank account numbers and which numbers were meaningless. Musong suggested that I call my bank in the US. I couldn’t call them because it was 1 am back in California. I couldn’t access my account online either, because I couldn’t remember my password for my online bank account. Musong didn’t take the news well. He couldn’t believe I hadn’t memorized my bank account number. I decided just to pick a series of numbers off the money transfer statement and put those in as my bank account number on the medical insurance amenity form.

“By the way, how much money are they going to give me?” I asked.

Musong translated the question to the teller.

“$1,007,” she responded.

I was blown away, suddenly the bank account number took on a little more important role. We then left the medical insurance amenity building, not knowing if I guessed my bank account number correctly or not. I could always call them back later if I needed to update the account number. We headed back to the academy and tried to book the plane ticket on line. Musong and I had our hands full once again. It was impossible to make a reservation on a US website with the boss’ Korean credit card. We tried all of her over 15 different credit cards and nothing worked. I had two more days until I needed to leave my officetel. I still hadn’t done a thing in terms of packing my stuff.

Several hours and credit cards later we booked an eTicket on Air China for $649. After we booked the ticket Miss Kang transferred my last month’s paycheck to my account via her cell phone. I was free. I shook everyone’s hand. As I was leaving Miss Kang gave me a US $100 bill and said “Pocket money.”

I thanked her again and left. As I was walking out the door I heard Musong say in English. “You should use two hands when taking money.”

__________________________________________________

Everything You Wanted To Know About Teaching English In Korea But Were Afraid To Ask

There has been an exploding demand for native English speakers to teach English in South Korea. English programs and English academies have been spreading like wildfire all over Korea. And, due to an unpredictable economy, many university graduates, travelers, and people from all walks of life are packing their bags and taking advantage of the English boom in Korea.
Korean institutions are paying good money ($2,000-$2,500 a month) and offering excellent benefits (free housing, 30 hour work weeks) to Westerners who are willing to explore the unfamiliar, pack up their bags, and teach in thriving South Korea.
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This is the complete guidebook on how to relocate to South Korea and become an English teacher. This book illustrates the many advantages (low taxes, high standard of living, friendly people, safe streets) and challenges (dating, language barriers, disciplining students, getting along with co-workers) that the first time teacher can expect to confront in Korea.
Funny, fact filled and always informative, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” provides the necessary knowledge you need to make the most out of the experience. Jam packed with practical information, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” addresses all of the topics and taboos a prospective English teacher needs to know, from finding the right job and negotiating a contract settlement to avoid eating dog while ordering food off of a menu.While other books focus solely on classroom experience,“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” explores life outside of the classroom, providing you with an in-depth and often hilarious guide to Korean culture, food, friendship, drinking, dating, religion, health and history are just some of the subjects discussed in detail.Last but not least,
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” looks at the embarrassing realities of life abroad, offering pause for thought on such issues as learning how to pronounce Korean students’ names, a 15-minute golf lesson I got in Korean that increased my driving distance 20%, my interactions with my Korean co-worker “Kid” who confesses to me that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and the cheapest and best eye surgery I’ve gotten in any country. “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” will awaken readers to the transitional opportunities available in a place that shares few Western customs but many of the comforts of home.
Written by Brian Ward, a semi-qualified middle school teacher whose walked the fine line between sanity and a nervous breakdown in the classroom, “First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” is an irreverent and insightful survival guide for anyone brave enough to try their hand at teaching English in South Korea or who just wants to have a laugh at author Brian Ward’s backwards approach to living in Korean culture.
This guidebook also compares teaching in the USA to teaching in Korea.
_______________________________________________________
Country Salary
(Year)
Yearly Taxes Yearly Housing Expenses Total Remaining
Korea $26,000 + 50% of medical bills paid $780   $0 $25,220
USA   $35,000 $8,000 $8,400 $18,600
_______________________________________________________
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com
Here is a chapter by chapter synopsis of the book:
Chapter 1
Dreams vs. Getting a Paycheck
This chapter profiles author’s friend Nick Lee, the hedonistic boozer surrounded by books, half-finished paintings and an old LP player — speaks in English rather than Greek or Latin. Prodigious nose, has been retooled as a heroic pretty boy. As Nick Lee’s life finally falls apart due to alcohol and lack of physical contact with women, the author decides to get on a plane to Korea. Upon his arrival to South Korea, he is taken back when he learns the true meaning of “Hair Shops” in Korea.
Chapter 2
Academy Owners
This chapter discusses the 4 major types of academy owners as well as which category I was working for. This chapter also discusses my “first contact” with my boss and Korean co-workers. This chapter reveals what a failure I am at teaching and includes the letters I received from Seoul which explained where I should improve. Introduced in this chapter is Carlo, an English teacher famous for drinking with Russians, getting bit by his students and his travels throughout Morocco.
In this chapter I get fired from my first job and start a new job. I am also forced to learn a little bit about Korean culture in order to be able to converse better with my students. Also introduced in this chapter is Jackie and the story of his dog “Blackie.” Also discussed is the Korean co-worker culture and what that entails.
Chapter 3
First Non-Monopoly Month in Class
I learn which class tattled on me for playing Monopoly every day in class. I also try different techniques for disciplining my students. I also discuss the advantages of talking with the students versus making them do exercises and what makes talking to the students so difficult. Also discussed is more of Carlo’s antics outside of the classroom. I finally get the bright idea of discussing the rules in class. I meet Carlo again out of class and we discuss the problems of his life; mainly how to deal with a belligerent student who happens to be the boss’ daughter in class.
Chapter 4
Bars and Churches
There are two types of English teachers in Mokpo, those who hang out in the bars and the other who hang out in church. Frankly I was getting tired of hanging out with the English teachers in bars. I decide to go to church instead. On my first day of church I discover that there is free orange juice and cookies served after each session. I meet Ms. Jung who explains to me why the street in Korea are so clean and how it affects retired Korean people. I also get my first private English student. Jackie’s house becomes haunted by a ghost and he reveals how to chase ghosts away. I go to my first baseball game.
Chapter 5
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 6
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 7
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group that is run by my Korean friend Jackie. This group becomes a great way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Next, my former roommate, Carlo, gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 8
4th of July in Korea
Author goes to a 4th of July party with his new-found church friends. He meets another English teacher named Tareck. Tareck is famous for kicking chairs across the classroom to get his students’ attention as well as living in the same apartment as his nudist boss.
Chapter 9
Kidman
Brian meets his first English-speaking co-teacher who goes by the name “Kid.” During their first time out for a hike together Kid confesses to Brian that he was accused by his ex-wife of burning down her house and that he likes dating Japanese women.
Chapter 10
Modem vs. Router
I have my first run in with Korean modems and their downfalls. Jackie comes to my rescue and gives me some much-needed internet advice.
Chapter 11
Golfing in Korea
I meet my first Korean golf instructor who gives me best golf lesson ever using no English. Using my new-found golf skills I decide to golf a few rounds of golf with my new co-teacher George and his brother.
Chapter 12
English Meetings at Angel-In-Us Café
In addition to going to church, I join another group in Korea. This one is and English group and is run by Jackie. I find another way to meet new friends and discuss current events in Korea. Carlo gets taken to the police station and I talk to him before he gets deported from Korea. I also meet my replacement who’s teaching at my previous academy.
Chapter 13
Lesson Plans
Brian reveals the most effective way to plan for his classes; by downloading lessons plans off the internet. Included in these lesson plans is  sample menu that is used to help the students role-play the purchasing of a hamburger in class.
Chapter 14
Dating in Korea
Brian shares four case studies of native teachers (males) who are dating Korean women. Included in these case studies are the reactions of the host-woman’s friends, families and social network.
Chapter 15
Surgery on a Budget
Brian get learns the difference between hospitals in Seoul (where the rich Koreans go) and all other hospitals in Korea. Brian finds the best value in Korea which is eye surgery which is priced at $2,500 in Korea vs. $28,000 in the United States. While in the hospital Brian meets an American man named Roman who’s been living in Korea since the 1970′s and publishing a book about a Post-Apocalyptic New England town. When Brian asks Roman who his book publishing agent is Roman replies, “The guy’s an idiot, he’s 62 and has just had his 6th child with his 3rd wife. What kind of a life is that kid going to have?”
“First Contact in Korea: A Native English Teacher’s Journey Into The Backwoods of South Korea” by Brian Ward, can be found on Amazon.com